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Aug 25th, 2005


Gillian: Iím dating flesh, and I want flesh to make a commitment to me.

Chris: On our ten year anniversary weíre going to take off the next joint, and then the whole finger on our twentieth.

The pictures were hard to look at, expecially the ends of the stumps. Am I the only one who put their finger in their mouth to test the amount of force you'd need to bite down before it started to hurt? Creepy!


Aug 25th, 2005


Dickheads.


Aug 25th, 2005


holy shit.. that's.. wtf? I don't even know how to process this knowledge.


Aug 25th, 2005


They wasted an entire bottle of Bacardi 151 to preserve their amputated fingers. That's a waste of booze, those sick fucks!


Aug 25th, 2005


Very hard to read through this. And yes I did bite down on my finger. What an intense thing to read. The are obviously fucked up. Man i cant describe the weirdness i feel.


Aug 25th, 2005


"Iím not dating a ring, and I donít want a ring. Iím dating flesh."

Er... glad to see they've progressed past the lust period of the relationship...


Aug 25th, 2005


What do they bite off if they get a divorce?


Aug 25th, 2005


I think we're all missing the point here. That chick is pretty hot.


Aug 25th, 2005


^ True! <3


Aug 25th, 2005


Yeah, but she's missing a finger. That's not hot at all.

In any case, this is very disturbing. It honestly sounds like the dude is whipped, way more whipped than most guys. He definitely didn't seem to want to chop his finger off and the chick was doing most of the talking, telling him to shut up a lot of times.


Aug 26th, 2005


Well, if he was reluctant he's fucked now.


Aug 26th, 2005


"He definitely didn't seem to want to chop his finger off and the chick was doing most of the talking, telling him to shut up a lot of times."

I don't think this is the time to be pointing the finger.


Aug 26th, 2005


They will be a fun couple to watch in Divorce Court. Not that I watch that show.

The chick is hot.


Aug 26th, 2005


hmmm. I don't think there's a girl hot enough or a love strong enough to make me want to disfigure myself.


Aug 26th, 2005


I really hope they went to the hospital or SOMETHING. Ugh. That just looks so unsanitary.


Aug 26th, 2005


Was Mike Tyson their best man?


Aug 26th, 2005


The girl was cute right up until the point that she started EATING FINGERS.


Aug 26th, 2005


And I would do anything for love, I'd run right into hell and back
I would do anything for love, I'll never lie to you and that's a fact
But I'll never forget the way you feel right now, oh no, no way
And I would do anything for love, but I won't do that, I won't do that
Anything for love, oh I would do anything for love
I would do anything for love, but I won't do that, oh I won't do that

Some days it don't come easy, and some days it don't come hard
Some days it don't come at all, and these are the days that never end
Some nights you're breathing fire, and some nights you're carved in ice
Some nights you're like nothing I've ever seen before or will again

Maybe I'm crazy, but it's crazy and it's true
I know you can save me, no one else can save me now but you

As long as the planets are turning, as long as the stars are burning
As long as your dreams are coming true, you better believe it

That I would do anything for love, and I'll be there til the final act
I would do anything for love, and I'll take a vow and seal a pact

But I'll never forgive myself if we don't go all the way tonight
And I would do anything for love, oh I would do anything for love
Oh I would do anything for love, but I won't do that, no I won't do that

I would do anything for love, anything you've been dreaming of
But I just won't do that
(repeats 3x)

(Solo)

Some days I pray for silence, and somedays I pray for soul
Some days I just pray to the God of Sex and Drums and Rock 'N Roll
Some nights I lose the feeling, and some nights I lose control
Some nights I just lose it all when I watch you dance and the thunder rolls

Maybe I'm lonely and that's all I'm qualified to be
There's just one and only, the one and only promise I can keep

As long as the wheels are turning, as long as the fires are burning
As long as your prayers are coming true, you better believe it

That I would do anything for love, and you know it's true and that's a fact
I would do anything for love, and there'll never be no turning back

But I'll never do it better than I do it with you, so long, so long
And I would do anything for love, oh I would do anything for love
I would do anything for love, but I won't do that, no no no I won't do that

I would do anything for love, anything you've been dreaming of
But I just won't do that
(repeats 7x)

But I'll never stop dreaming of you every night of my life, no way

And I would do anything for love, oh I would do anything for love
I would do anything for love, but I won't do that, no I won't do that

[Girl:] Will you raise me up, will you help me down?
Will you get me right out of this Godforsaken town?
Will you make it all a little less cold?

[Boy:] I can do that! I can do that!

[Girl:] Will you hold me sacred? Will you hold me tight?
Can you colorize my life, I'm so sick of black and white?
Can you make it all a little less old?

[Boy:] I can do that! Oh oh, now I can do that!

[Girl:] Will you make me some magic, with your own two hands?
Can you build an emerald city with these grains of sand?
Can you give me something I can take home?

[Boy:] I can do that! Oh oh now, I can do that!

[Girl:] Will you cater to every fantasy I got?
Will ya hose me down with holy water, if I get too hot?
Will you take me places I've never known?

[Boy:] I can do that! Oh oh now, I can do that!

[Girl:] After a while you'll forget everything
It was a brief interlude and a midsummer night's fling
And you'll see that it's time to move on

[Boy:] I won't do that! No I won't do that!

[Girl:] I know the territory, I've been around
It'll all turn to dust and we'll all fall down
And sooner or later, you'll be screwing around

[Boy:] I won't do that! No I won't do that!

Anything for love, oh I would do anything for love
I would do anything for love, but I won't do that, no I won't do that


Aug 26th, 2005


This might have been somewhat cool if they cut off their ring fingers and attached them to each other's hands.


Aug 26th, 2005


That would be kinda cool!


Aug 27th, 2005


Aw, that would've been awesome!


Aug 28th, 2005


I just noticed.... this story was posted on April Fool's Day.... coincedence?


Sep 10th, 2005


Top Ten Half-Assed Jokes I Came Up With For This:

1) Damn, I feel like such a slut... I've been giving the finger to LOTS of people over the years.
2) Ironically, they chose not to circumcise their children.
3) Of course, if they DID choose to circumcise their children, they'd get arrested for pedophilia.
4) Her parents must be so proud.
5) Usually, you wait until AFTER the ceremony to have a joint. And the less witnesses, the better!
6) What a lousy way to save 2 month's salary.
7) This is going to make their "birds & bees" conversation with their children seem like a chapter from a Clive Barker novel.
8) They did the biting without anesthesia, and used Bacardi 151 to preserve the finger bits. Good thing they didn't rush into this decision.
9) Someone should have told Mike Tyson that same-sex marriages weren't legal yet.
10) This isn't a marriage, it's a scene from a Quentin Tarantino movie!


Sep 19th, 2005


I was just thinking to myself, "Sure, they're comitted to each other, but did they have to be so extreme?" I mean, instead of amutating their fingers, they could have burned scars or got rings tattooed on their fingers. Just as permenant, but less. . .bitey. . .


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